Sunday, April 6, 2014

Anatomy of a Hater: How to Spot People Who Are Jealous of You




It's been said that, "Success breeds success," and this is certainly true. However, there's another side of success that is not talked about as often but occurs just as much and that is....Success also breeds resentment and jealousy.

As you rise in life and elevate your game, it's important to remember that no matter how well-intentioned, helpful or pleasant you are that there are some people who won't want to see you shine. In fact they are hoping to see you fall. So much so that they will try to dismiss you, diminish your achievements, pretend they don't see you rising, assassinate your character, discredit you, talk about you behind your back, use innuendos and sarcasm to try to get at you or attempt to eat from your plate without putting in the work to make the meal.

A jealous person won't come out and tell you that they are jealous of you, nor will they admit it to anyone else. Why? Their pride and ego won't allow it. Instead their jealousy will show up in the form of resentment, subtle put downs, constant criticism, open hostility, imitation, gossiping, playing down your accomplishments, an insatiable need to try and one-up you, not inviting you to certain events for fear that you will outshine them, not wanting you to come around their other friends for fear that their friends may actually see that you are a stand up kind of person and want to become your friend too, waiting on the sidelines wishing for your demise and last but not least...kicking you when you fall.

Jealousy comes in many forms. Sometimes a person will be jealous of your success or accomplishments, your persistence in pursuing your dreams, your charisma, your happiness and peace of mind, your faith walk, your strength, looks, resources, business savvy, your influence, your marriage, your family relationships, network of people you know or your ability to bounce back from adversity. And jealous people can exist everywhere - at work, in church, within your family, with your friends and even within your online social networks. See the thing is, when you have a deeper sense of self-esteem, resilience and purpose, it can intimidate others and cause them to resent you, often without even knowing why. Be that as it may, you cannot allow other people's issues with you to cause you to play your life small.

Jealousy is like a parasite. Once you allow it into your space it literally sucks the life right out of you. This is why it is key that the moment you encounter jealousy you cut it off at the head. Don't give jealous people any room in your life to impact you, any space in your head to discourage you or any power to rob you of your peace, purpose or destiny. Simply hold your head up high and continue to do you.

Whether you are dealing with a person who is ignorant, insecure, malicious or miserable, the best thing that you can do when a jealous person comes your way is to put as much distance as possible between you and that person. You cannot afford to allow jealous people to block your blessings and rain on your parade. An overtly jealous person can be easily identified, as he will single you out for competition in any and every endeavor you undertake. What is more dangerous is the covert jealous person who smiles in your face while shoving an ice pick in your back. This kind of person sits back and waits for the opportune time to badmouth you on the low or set up traps to trip you up along the way.

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