Mindfulness Practice for Healing

A huge part of my healing journey from self loathing to self love has been Mindfulness Practice. Without this technique and way of life, I could never be fully healed.

Mindfulness does so many things, one of which is that it gives you space. Space between the past and present, between stimulus and response, between your emotions and your reason, between thoughts and feelings, between inner critic and true self, between self and higher self, between self and God, between what you want to do and what is effective--and so much more. 

Without a mindfulness practice, which I work each and every day as often as possible, I could only be healed up to a point. With mindfulness practice, I am coming in complete control of how I feel, how I react and how I live my life. I cannot say enough good things about Mindfulness and Meditation Practice. I do it every single day.

Benefits of Meditation

I found this description of meditation from an article about opening the pineal gland. Living a meditative life is a requirement for those who need inner healing. Inner wounds draw one to the source of the pain which you find can only be healed through meditative practice. No self abandonment will suffice. If you are wounded and you want to heal, you must go to the source of the pain, face yourself and know all about yourself. The truth.

Anyway, here's the article excerpt.

Meditation is the art of mastering the mind through the development and strengthening of one’s awareness. Being that the subconscious mind is constantly dumping thoughts at random into the conscious mind and can hijack one’s consciousness and attention, it is critical that one develop their capacity to master their mind so that they can steer it in the direction they truly want.

As the barriers between the subconscious and conscious mind are gradually dissolved through the act of meditation, one progressively gains more and more of a leash over their consciousness, which in turn enables them to direct their will power more precisely into what they truly aim to accomplish with their life.

Being that our mind/brain is constantly in action in both our waking lives and dreaming lives, it is an organ of the body that is typically deprived of enough time to be rested and rejuvenated. In meditation, one seeks to relax the mind through putting one’s awareness and intention on stillness. In this state one allows themselves to stop their thoughts and worries and just be at peace for the meditations duration. If and when thoughts arise during meditation, it is the meditator’s mission to not engage in the thought, but to view it from a third person perspective without identifying with it.

Through the practice of this act, one gains more mastery over the subconscious mind and as well as a better perspective on their own undesirable mental programs that may be running like a feedback loop. As one progresses in meditation and the mind acquires more and more stillness, tension in the mind from over-active thinking is reduced and the grey matter of the brain becomes more soft and flexible. In turn the pineal gland which sits in the center of the right and left hemispheres of the brain is enabled to function with greater energetic receptivity and transmutation.

From this article: 3 Most Powerful Tools for Opening the Pineal Gland.

How to Meditate to Connect with Your Core Self [SelfLoveU Video]

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Mindfulness Skills

What? - Mindfulness and DBT "What Skills"

The Practice of Self Soothing

Self soothing is a practice that I found I was completely missing earlier in my life. What is it? Self soothing is more than just bubble baths, candles, journaling and yoga, though it can include those things. Self soothing is something much deeper and more personal; and perhaps one of the most important aspects of Self Love that you can foster yourself.

Self soothing is the ability to calm yourself down in moments of stress or intense emotions. It is your emotional barometer, your internal regulator that keeps you emotionally stable, balanced and effective in personal mood control and relationships. Without the ability to soothe yourself, you cannot tolerate much. If you don't have enough self soothing tools in your toolbox, your relationship with yourself and others will suffer.

Adequate self care is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships, and for keeping you secure as a person. You need to find ways to reconnect with yourself and recenter--regardless of what is going on around you. Think of self soothing as a baby sucking its thumb. It's a way to stay cool until mama gets her butt over here. For us, we need ways to soothe ourselves, to reassure ourselves as an escape from hard, intense emotions.

If you don't have adequate self soothing skills that are learned naturally through parenting in childhood, then you're going to have a difficult time in life. Symptoms of lacking this skill include cutting, addiction and even suicide. People who are severely depressed are likely missing this important self-nurturing capability. Thankfully, the process of self soothing can be learned and practiced.

There are many ways to practice self soothing. Relaxation techniques are soothing to the psyche, and all self soothing involves positive, nurturing self talk. I'm going to break down different ways you can self soothe both physically, emotionally and mentally.

Physical Self Soothing

• Bubble Baths, Massages, Spa, Sauna, Steam Room
• Exercise, Yoga, Cardio, Weight Training, Swimming
• Organizing, Cleaning, Decorating Your Home 
• Cooking Your Favorite Meal
• Relaxing by the Fire
• Home Improvement, Painting, Refinishing
• Art, Poetry, Blogging, Social Media 
• Calling a Friend, Socializing
• Joining a Support Group, Booking a Therapist
• Attending Concert or Show
• Going out of your way for yourself
• Singing, Karaoke
• Hobbies, Flying, Skydiving
• Spending time with Children

 Emotional Self Soothing

Emotional self soothing is a way to keep you balanced and regulates your emotions. 

• Positive Self Talk
• Reminding Yourself of Positive Things You Did This Morning
• Restating negative self opinions, correcting yourself 
• Planning your personal time for the week
• Planning your social activities for the week
• Embracing your inner child
• Speaking to yourself compassionately
• Doing shame reduction work
• Writing letters to those who hurt you
• Writing out your thoughts, Journaling
• Being with yourself through your pain
• Breath Work to get in touch with emotions
• Speaking to yourself with compassion 
• Reminding yourself how far you've come
• Facing reality, not allowing your emotions to go overboard

Mental Self Soothing 

Mental Self Soothing is soothing your intellect. I like to think of it as ways you help yourself succeed. 

• Reminding yourself of past accomplishments
• Directing yourself on the steps you need to take to reach your goal
• Organizing your day
• Listening or reading motivational content
• Social media 
• Reading spiritual texts
• Reading intellectual material, or excellent fiction
• Planning for the future
• Planning your career
• Reminding yourself that You. Can. Do. It! 
• Learning about mentors

 These activities are productive ways to soothe yourself day-to-day, moment-to-moment. If practiced, you will become more vibrant, whole and attuned to your own spirit. I'm sure there is much more to add, but my eyes are sleepy, so goodnight! Love to all. <3

"Rigidity is a form of self soothing when you are afraid of the unknown." dotJenna

Dr. Dan Siegel- On Integrating the Two Hemispheres of Our Brains

What Mindfulness Is to Me

Mindfulness has helped me a great deal in my healing from issues in my life. It is through mindfulness that I figured out who I was, and organized my identity. Mindfulness to me is not the same as it is on all the Zen blogs and new age websites. Mindfulness to me is about being aware of my present state of mind, feelings, emotions, physical sensations, thoughts and intuition. Mindfulness is about being open and connected within myself. I can't tell you all the benefits I've gained from this practice! Mindfulness has been one of the most important tools for my healing and personal growth.

When I'm talking about Mindfulness, I'm talking about several things, so I'll try to describe here. First, Mindfulness to me means awareness. Awareness of everything, such as:

• How I'm feeling
• How my body feels when I feel this way
• Where the pain is
• Where the joy is
• What I'm thinking
• What I'm doing
• How others are responding to me
• Where my emotion at any given moment is residing in my physical body
• What I'm telling myself about certain situations
• My inner critic, internal judgments
• My needs, wants & desires
• My best interests overall
• Anxiety, Fear, Panic, Negative emotions
• Happiness, Joy, Bliss, Positive emotions
• Substitutes for feelings
• Addictive Behaviors, Habits, Patterns
• Relating with others
• Intuition
• Internal Warning Sensors  
• Cognitive distortions
• Internal contradictions

Mindfulness for me goes a step beyond awareness, to the realm of trust. Trusting in these sensations, feelings and intuitions of myself... Mindfulness helps me to establish a foundation of trust, security and belief in who I am, what I need and my right to be, feel, know and do at any given moment. Mindfulness is my core-root of beingness, the seat of my soul, the wise part of me that watches and rules (whenever possible) over my cognitions, beliefs and feelings.

Mindfulness to me is an internal guidance system that I need to stay tapped-into if I am to operate my life in my own best interest, which in effect, serves the best interest of others. It was only once I learned to be the "observer" of myself that I was able to comprehend who I am, how I feel about specific experiences, and how to guide myself toward my highest good. It's a learning process. I'm still growing...

The practice of Mindfulness helped me discover who I am. I did not know who I was until I started being mindful, paying attention and focusing on my feelings, thoughts and bodily sensations. The more in tune I am with my internal workings, the better I am able to function effectively and keep myself intact in face of emotional harm.

If you are raised in an abusive environment, one that is invalidating to your soul, you may not be connected to the internal guide within your heart. This was me. I was detached from who I was because my feelings and sense of self respect were not validated and fostered in me as a child. It was only after I learned to TRUST my own internal sensations that I was able to operate effectively and to protect myself from boundary violations. Learning to trust myself also helped me to know what I needed and to get my needs met.

Thoughts on Mindfulness

By Sherrie Campbell, PhD

 

Being mindful is a quality which leads us into correct decision making. If we are mindfull, we have been present with our thoughts, our options, the bigger picture and what is in the best interest of our life. So often we make reactive decisions that not only hurt others, which cause us guilt and shame, but mostly these decisions hurt our lives, our ability to trust ourselves and our ability to love ourselves. Being mindful means that we come from our heart. We come from love. We come from a sense of calm and certainty. 

 

Reactive decisions create horrible karma and they contribute to the idea that we are not good enough, that we are not loveable. If we can slow down, communicate, write, read, research and gather information before we make decisions then we don't contribute to further lowering our self-love. There is always a correct answer to our problems in life. If one doesn't come immediately, then do nothing and continue to search your soul. 

 

When we love ourselves we want to show up as the best, most mature and thoughtful person we can be..even when that means we must set limits on people. We can still do this mindfully and with integrity. When we love ourselves, integrity is natural. When we love ourselves we make sure to be mindful of who we are and how we impact others. We are aware that when we are loving as people our lives work and when are not loving our lives do not work. Today be mindful of the YOU that you put into the world.