103 Things Codependents Don't Know

This article is a follow-up to all my articles on codependency and codependents, co-dependents and codependence. Use the search bar in the right column to see more terrific articles that will help you along your healing journey. 

1. Codependents don't know that all of their feelings are okay.
2. Codependents don't know how to feel their feelings moderately.
3. Codependents don't know they are detached from their feelings.
4. Codependents don't know that their feelings come out even though they're detached from their own feelings.
5. Codependents don't know that they project their unwanted, Shadow feelings onto others.
6. Codependents don't know that they blame others for the feelings that they have but will not recognize.
7. Codependents don't know how to let other people be where they are in their own process.
8. Codependents don't know that all the feelings are ok to have including mad, said, happy, angry, shame, guilt.
9. Codependents don't know that they are hiding your feelings from their self.
10. Codependents don't know that they can approve of and affirm themselves internally.
11. Codependents don't know where to draw the line between giving too much.
12. Codependents don't know where they stop and others begin. 
13. Codependents don't know how to appropriate blame in relationships. They either take too much or take too little.
14. Codependents don't know that other people cant read their minds.
15. Codependents don't know that they can't control other people by being extremely nice to them.
16. Codependents don't know when they're being manipulated or controlled.
17. Codependents often don't know when they're being used and abused.
18. Codependents don't know how to set boundaries.
19. Codependents don't know what their own values are.
20. Codependents don't realize when they are saving themselves.
21. Codependents don't really know what they need.
22. Codependents don't know how to face reality; they often don't know what reality is.
23. Codependents don't know what they deserve in life.
24. Codependents don't know how to have fun; they cope with life instead of living it.
25. Codependents don't know how to set limits on others.
26. Codependents don't know how to set limits on themselves and their contributions
27. Codependents don't know whenever they are care taking others excessively.
28. Codependents don't know it's okay to receive and not give all the time. 
29. Codependents do not realize they are being depleted of their energy because of their own over giving.
30. Co-dependents do not realize the value of their own energy.
31. Codependents do not know how to be interdependent.
32. Codependents do not know the difference between empowerment and victimization.
33. Codependents did not realize whenever they are blaming other people for their lack of responsibility on their own lives.
34. Codependents don't know that they take care of other people at times when they should be taking care of themselves.
35. Co-dependents don't know whenever they are crossing other people's boundaries.
36. Codependents don't know they are giving advice to people when things are none of their business.
37. Codependents don't know how to be there for a friend without trying to control them and help them and run their lives.
38. Co-dependents don't know how to let other people be who they are and learn in their own way.
39. Codependents don't know how to process their own emotions so they abandon themselves and focus on other people.
40. Codependents don't feel worthy of love on their own accord, just for being who they are; they feel they must pay other people for their love with making them happy, pleasing them and kind deeds.
41. Codependents don't know that they are lacking an internal boundary that would keep them from feeling over responsible for those around them.
42. Codependents don't know that their children have the right to make their own decisions without their approval.
43. Codependents don't know that they are being offensive when they give advice that's not requested.
44. Codependents do not know they are being manipulated in controlling to try to meet needs from others that they should be meeting on their own.
45. Codependents do not know how to have a normal conversation  because they feel responsible for making other people believe just like they do.
46. Codependents do not know that they are crazy without consensus of outside people about their own decisions.
47. Co-dependents don't know that you can be happy without the approval of others in all aspects of your life.
48. Co-dependents do not know where their responsibilities stops in relationships to others.
49. Co-dependents don't know where the healthy line is between self supporting and receiving support from others.
50. Co-dependents do not know how to support themselves emotionally.
51. Codependents do not know themselves.
52. Codependents do not know how to ask for help when it is appropriate.
53. Codependents do not know how to take care of themselves when they ask for help and it is not available from that single source. 
54. Co-dependents do not know how to feel free of Shame for the needs that they have.
55. Co-dependents do not know how to detach and let go of people so that they can own their own process.
56. Codependents do not know how to seek out healthy relationships that are nourishing to them.
57. Codependents do not know how to get out of relationships that are harmful to them.
58. Codependents do not know when they are being rigid and thinking in terms of black and white. 
59. Codependents do not know how to go inside themselves to find out how they feel what they think and what is best for them.
60. Codependents do not know how to listen to their own instincts and intuition.
61. Co-dependents do not realize when they are in a cycle of violence that continues to get worse.Co-dependents do not know how to protect themselves from harmful others.Codependence do not know how to love themselves.
62. Codependence do not know how to trust their own feelings of being taken advantage of.
63. Co-dependents don't know how to answer their own questions about their own lives.
64. Co-dependents don't know how to make your own decisions.
65. Codependents do not know how to dance to the music of Their Own Heart.
66. Codependents don't know how to love themselves unconditionally.
67. Codependents don't know how to love with no strings attached.
68. Codependents do not know how to be happy on their own.
69. Codependents do not know how to be happy without waiting on the next fix.
70. Co-dependents do not know that they are compulsive people Pleasers.
71. Co-dependents do not know that they do not need the approval from Outsiders to be ok.
72. Codependents do not know how to be themselves.
73. Co-dependents do not know that there is better relationships out there that do not require them to abandon themselves and sacrifice their own truth.
74. Co-dependents do not know that it's irritating to others to be taken care of too much.
75. Co-dependents do not know that it is okay for them to put their needs first in relationship with others.
76. Codependence do not know that they are controlling other people when they try to be too nice.
77. Codependence don't know that they are serving themselves whenever they try to be too nice to others.
    
78. Codependence don't know that their behaviour towards others invites disrespect.
79. Codependent don't know that they have the power at any moment to stand up for themselves and take care of themselves.
80. Codependence don't know that the pain they feel inside is not their fault but due to a toxic childhood.
81. Codependence don't know that they have the power to walk away at any time from any situation that does not serve them.
82. Codependence don't know that if they don't walk away from any situation that does not serve them that they are being depleted of their life energy, even though it may feel good to stay.
     
83. Codependence often do not know what it feels like to be treated with respect and dignity.
84. Codepents don't know they have a choice as to who they will allow in their lives.
85. Co-dependents don't know that they have the right to terminate relationships with anyone who is not treating them well.
86. Codependents don't know that they are in control of what they allow into their lives and how they allow others to treat them.
87. Co-dependents don't realize that they have options S2 what they prefer and how they prefer other people to treat them.
88. Codependents don't know that letting someone else have their own problems without trying to intervene is loving them.
89. Co-dependents don't know that it is not their job to fix other people.
90. Co-dependents don't know that other people are not responsible for making them happy or keeping them stable.
91. Co-dependents don't know that they have a right to speak up when they are not getting their needs met from their partner.
92. Codependence don't know that they are resentful when other people do not give back as much as they give.
93. Codependents do not know they are in denial about how badly they are being treated oftentimes.
94. Co-dependents do not know their part in the narcissistic dance. 
95. Co-dependents do not know that they are on the opposite color continuum of the narcissist and at the same energy level.
96. Codependent do not know that they are food for the narcissist, narcissistic supply.
97. Codependents do not know the difference between love and abuse.
98. Codependents do not know that they have the right to say no and not answer questions that are an invasion of their privacy.
99. Co-dependents do not know that they have a right to their own lives and their own privacy.
100. Codependents don't know how to fill the space between caretaking and self-care.
101. Codependents don't know that their lives are filled with toxic shame.
102. Codependents don't know how to listen to the negativity of the inner critic and override it with positive self-talk and reparenting.
103. Co-dependents don't know how to love others because they're too busy trying to get love from others by being good and helpful.